I realize I have posted two entries in the same day, but this was too significant to me to delay posting it.
I had an interesting dream last night. In my dream, which was about something completely different (helping save a newly discovered primitive society, but that is another story) I was walking through the back streets of this town. It was late at night and we were tying to get to an important meeting. As we were walking along this young, slender woman came out of a doorway and approached us. Our first inclination was to just ignore her and keep pressing onward. Something she said stopped me though, and cause me turn around. I don't remember her exact words, but she couldn't look us in the eyes, and was clearly ashamed of her need for money, and thought of herself as almost completely worthless, but she cried out to at least be considered, or just noticed, as if that was her greatest need. I stopped and went back to her and asked her what her price was for an evening, which took her by surprise, that anyone would even consider her for more than a few minutes. I told her I would pay her three times that amount to come with us and join in our conversations and give us her advice and thoughts. I told her that her significance was in who she was, not in being used or sold, and that she was significant. At that point I woke up.
I am reminded of Jesus' interaction with a woman, and how significantly He impacted her. We are told the story of a sinful woman who, in the first three Gospel stories about her, is unnamed. She is the sinful women who washed Jesus feet with her tears and dried them with her hair. This story is recounted in all four Gospels - Luke 7, Matt 26, Mark 14 and John 12, but it is only in John's Gospel that she is named. Many believe this is because by the time John's Gospel was written that she was no longer alive and it would not embarrass her. Some authors believe the stories in the synoptic Gospels and John are about different women. Regardless, in these stories found in the first three Gospels, she was someone who most of the town knew and discounted as a sinful women. Here is the description from Luke 7:37-39 NIV:
[37] "A woman in that town who lived a sinful life learned that Jesus was eating at the Pharisee’s house, so she came there with an alabaster jar of perfume. [38] As she stood behind him at his feet weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears. Then she wiped them with her hair, kissed them and poured perfume on them.
[39] When the Pharisee who had invited him saw this, he said to himself, “If this man were a prophet, he would know who is touching him and what kind of woman she is---that she is a sinner.”
I imagine this event, and the public display this was. Jesus was the guest of honor, therefore there were many people clamouring for His attention, and into this all walks this women, whom everyone knows about. I can just imagine her downcast eyes, the disdain with which others treat her, the wide bearth people give her, so as not to be seen as having associated wth with her previously. The scriptures don't say what her sinful past is, but its assumed that she was a prostitute (David Guzman commentary). The Greek word used is defined as someone devoted to sin, guilt of specific vices. In other words, she was more than an accidentally sinful person, but someone who's identity was wrapped up in her sin.
She was identified by her status as a sinner - see verse 37 and 39 above. What a terrible thing, to be labeled by one's sin. It is as if her significance as a person was so diminished that she was now only known by her sin. She was someone's daughter, likely someone's sister, and had significance and a place of belonging in those contexts, but apparently they all were forgotten, or overlooked, probably whispered behind her back. She was desperate for forgiveness, and healing, and something inside her gave her the courage to push past everything and everyone that would hold her back.
Its interesting that in Matthew's and Mark's Gospels the biggest thing that people were focused on was the waste of the expensive perfume. Even in her extravagance of love and devotion, people were sniping about her. This poor woman couldn't catch a break. I think this is so true of the way we judge one another. We label people and see everything they do through the label we place on them, the labels color our perceptions. She was considered worthless, and when she does something of great worth, people call it wasteful.
We have many sources of labels for people, - what they do, or don't do, how they act, their sins, their sickness, their possessions, or lack of possessions, the way the dress, the way they smell, the way they interact with others, the way they laugh, the list is almost endless. We are quick to categorize based on these labels and then treat them according to the label we have affixed.
Additionally, in our interaction with others, we sometimes allow their labels for us to become our identity. We identify ourselves as losers, unattractive, geeks, nerds, ugly, worthless, unwanted, unworthy, or lame and those terms never start inside of us. We lay claim to identities that are thrust upon us by others. I remember times where I felt labeled, and limited by those labels. Inside I was screaming, "That is not who I am!" It was with great difficulty that I was able to break off those labels. Some people never do break free, and instead take the labels on as their identity, and limit themselves in how they think of themselves.
Jesus refused to label her, or let her embrace their label for her! He even called everyone's attention to the woman, which must have been incredibly uncomfortable for her, and lifted her up in everyone's eyes. He gave her value and significance, He recognized who she was, and what she had done, and praised her in front of everyone!
Here is what He said, as quoted in Matthew 26:10-13 NIV: [10] "Aware of this, Jesus said to them, “Why are you bothering this woman? She has done a beautiful thing to me. [11] The poor you will always have with you, but you will not always have me. [12] When she poured this perfume on my body, she did it to prepare me for burial. [13] Truly I tell you, wherever this gospel is preached throughout the world, what she has done will also be told, in memory of her.”
Here is the exchange from Luke's recounting: Luke 7:44-46 NIV: [44] "Then he turned toward the woman and said to Simon, “Do you see this woman? I came into your house. You did not give me any water for my feet, but she wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. [45] You did not give me a kiss, but this woman, from the time I entered, has not stopped kissing my feet. [46] You did not put oil on my head, but she has poured perfume on my feet."
My reflection on this all is that I need to change the way I treat others and look at others. I know that I am quick to label and categorize, and I must learn to look at others through the eyes of the Lord, seeing them for who they are and their significance in His eyes. I need to stop and look past the labels I have for them or those they might have embraced, and see the person. As Heidi Baker says, "stop for the one!" I need to learn to stop walking past people, and instead learn to engage them, see their value and significance and speak that which I see and hear to them and those around me, just as Jesus did for this woman.
Finally, I want to see myself as Jesus sees me, and believe it all. I know that I still have a hard time grasping my own worth and significance. I would rather believe in my own limitations and hiddenness, than take a chance in living out some of the things I think the Lord sees in me. I tend to listen to others more than I listen to the Lord, and as such my perspective of my life and my value is colored by the wrong voice(s). I should be listening to the Lord's voice as the sole source of authority about who I am and what value I have in His view. Lord, I want Your perspective of me to be the only one that defines me. I want to explore all the depths and width and fullness of who You say I am. I want to overcome the labels I have for myself and that others have affixed on me, and see myself as beloved and worthy of the Lord's affections.
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