The Folly of Impatience

This morning I am continuing my reading from John's Gospel. The following verses have caught my attention this morning:

John 6:14-21 NIV:

[14] "After the people saw the sign Jesus performed, they began to say, “Surely this is the Prophet who is to come into the world.” [15] Jesus, knowing that they intended to come and make him king by force, withdrew again to a mountain by himself.

[16] When evening came, his disciples went down to the lake, [17] where they got into a boat and set off across the lake for Capernaum. By now it was dark, and Jesus had not yet joined them. [18] A strong wind was blowing and the waters grew rough. [19] When they had rowed about three or four miles, they saw Jesus approaching the boat, walking on the water; and they were frightened. [20] But he said to them, “It is I; don’t be afraid.” [21] Then they were willing to take him into the boat, and immediately the boat reached the shore where they were heading."

So my first thought on reading these verses was 'what were the disciples thinking, leaving Jesus and heading by boat to the other side?' I mean, really? Jesus goes up on the mountain, evening comes and they decide since Jesus hasn't come back down, lets get in a boat and ditch him? That is essentially what they did! No wonder they were frightened when they saw Him walking on the water towards them. I wonder if they didn't think they were in big trouble?

It is interesting that John was one of the guys in the boat and writing this story. He adds a very telling note in verse 21, that it was only after Jesus spoke to them that they were "willing" to let Him into the boat. In other words, prior to that moment they had been considering the alternative.

There are times that I get the strong impression that the Apostles were totally confused much of the time, and when Jesus isn't there to guide them, they totally fall off the path. This is one of those times. They apparently make bad decision after bad decision, until Jesus speaks and they come to their senses. I think it is actually pretty funny, and appreciate the humanness of them all. It helps me relate to them.

Actually as I meditate on this story, I would say this is the state I find myself in fairly regularly. I don't wait for the Lord. I make a bad decision, followed by a series of bad decisions, and find myself struggling trying to move forward. If I sense the Lord's presence I am afraid because I also know I didn't wait for His presence to guide me, or His will to become clear. Instead, in my humanness, I feel I can't wait another minute and make a decision, just so I can get moving. It might be that my circumstances are getting darker, the wind is blowing and I am not feeling comfortable, and these are my excuses. Or maybe I feel I need to be somewhere else, and I have been waiting too long on the Lord to move, so I just decide to head out. I have lots of excuses, but the result is generally the same - struggle and failure.

I am encouraged this morning that waiting on the Lord is the only thing to do in these situations. When He got in the boat, the winds calmed and immediately they were transported to their destination. They spent hours and tons of effort rowing those three or four miles. If they had waited for Jesus to come, their trip would have been effortless and immediate.

Oh Lord, help me to wait on You, no matter how dark my circumstances. You have the plan and the power to see my purpose fulfilled, and waiting for You to bring revelation is the best thing I can do at this moment. The good news is that You weren't angry with them, and You aren't angry with me if You find me somewhere struggling to move forward, having not waited for You. You will bring about Your plan and purpose, all I need to do is welcome back into my life and my decisions. It truly is folly to be impatient with You Lord.

That is good news Lord! Thank You!