My Mom, Her Legacy

For those of you who don’t know, my mother passed from this earthly existence on March 9th.  For those who knew her, it was a surprise and yet not a surprise, as she had been ready and was tired, and mentioned it often.  It was a surprise in that she appeared in good health, was her typical 92 year old self, still living at her condo by herself, alert mentally, slowed physically by her knee and other ailments from her 92 years of life.  Mom had been praying that the Lord would allow her to pass in her sleep in her own bed, and that is exactly how she transitioned into  eternal life, after a full weekend of family activity.  Her bed was undisturbed and it looked like the Lord just met her peacefully in a similar way that my Dad passed 10 ½ years, ago, passed into eternity in an instant.

I am so grateful that her passing was quick, and peaceful, for though she didn’t fear death, she wasn’t a fan of pain and suffering.  She was definitely ready to pass-on, her heart was at peace and she was looking forward to seeing Dad again. She had a picture on her wall of the two of them dancing and the caption under it read, “The Dance Will Continue” and I am sure that is exactly what is happening now in heaven, no more bad knee, or swollen hands!  

Mom had much more spirit than many of us thought, for we were quite sure that when Dad passed she wouldn’t be far behind him, but she surprised us all, and I think surprised herself, when she chose to continue to live, knowing that her Mom and older sisters had all lived well after their husbands passed.  She was resilient in an old wiry person sort of way, she had 3 hip replacements, and needed a new knee, she broke ribs, tore muscles, lacerated her liver in one recent fall, but recovered from them all in amazingly quick fashion and returned time and again to her condo, her friends and her family. 

I liked to get her going, trying to get a rise out of her by saying things that I knew would catch her attention, and she never ceased to rise to the occasion, firing back some sly remark, with a sparkle in her eye and knowing smile..  Even in her hospital room or rehab she would rise up and respond with her sly wit.  She was worried about her lapses of memory, but then would destroy me with a 10 move rearrangement of the rummi-cube table to clear her tiles.  

She had more fire in her than we thought, and I pray that in some small way I can emulate her fire, her love for life, her love for her family, and her modest and simple life!  She loved caring for those around her, was never a showboating type (I must have got that from my dad) and was one who had this inner peace and joy.

She used to wonder what would happen to all her stuff when she passed.  She would comment on it often and I would always assure her that she didn’t need to worry about it.  I realize now that it was her way of wondering if people cared enough about her to want something to remember her by, and I can assure you her whole family absolutely loved her enough to want keepsakes that remind us of our loving Mom, Grandma and GG (great grandma).

As I think back on our life, I think two things stand out about mom, her faithfulness and her love.  She was faithful in her love, support, and care for our family, and was the constant in our life. Not that Dad wasn't as well, but she was a stay-at-home Mother, who was always there!  She had 5 children in 6 years, and our little sis 6 years later, and was always cooking, cleaning, caring, baking, making lunches, and watching over us.  She was a great example of love, and was for me my first real example of someone that loved me unconditionally.  I remember well her care, her special allowances for my certain food dislikes, and her constant support and care.  

These last 10 ½ years I have tried to visit her regularly, and it was always a joy to come home, and spend the weekend with her, playing cards, rummi-cube, talking, sharing a meal, etc.  She never allowed her own issues to keep her from loving on me.  We shared many a meal and many desserts and sweets.

Mom’s faithfulness and love also had a firm foundation in her faith, for she was trying to live as one who followed Christ Jesus, and her whole life revolved around her faith.  Every morning she would spend time in prayer, and if she could she would attend Catholic Mass daily.  She loved her faith, and loved God and saw her life as an expression of that love.  As I mentioned before she was a great example of unconditional love, the same love that  God has for each of us.  I am confident of this, that she prayed for me, and everyone in our family, children, grandchildren and great grandchildren every day!  

I could keep on writing, and probably will one day, but I just wanted all to know what a wonderful mother I had, and what an amazing woman she was.  I will miss her the rest of my life, and while the pain is less knowing she was ready and passed peacefully, the pain will be there until I see her again.  I do know that she was met with a loving embrace and heard the words, “Well done my good and faithful one!”

I love you Mom and always will!  Your legacy of love and faithfulness lives on in your children, grand-children and great-granchildren!

Dance on, for your knees and hips are brand-new!