Yesterday during our church's worship service, one of our members shared about an insight into the prodigal son story, that got me thinking. I had actually been reflecting on that story, found in Luke 15, earlier in the morning, and when he shared I was reminded of an insight I had previously concerning the older son. As I sat running those ideas through my mind, I had some new insight as well. Here are the verses of my reflection this morning - Luke 15:21-32 NIV:
[21] “The (younger) son said to him, 'Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.'
[22] “But the father said to his servants, 'Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. [23] Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let's have a feast and celebrate. [24] For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.' So they began to celebrate.
[25] “Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. [26] So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on. [27] 'Your brother has come,' he replied, 'and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.'
[28] “The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. [29] But he answered his father, 'Look! All these years I've been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. [30] But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!'
[31] “ 'My son,' the father said, 'you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. [32] But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.' ”
The story about the younger son is an awesome story that Jesus told describing for us the Father's response to us when we sin, or fall away from relationship with Him. The Father is all about restoring relationship and identity to the younger son, and He celebrates His return.
Yesterday, while reflecting on this story I was again drawn to the older son and his attitude, and perception on the Father, I think there are three things that really stand out to me. First, the older son has totally mischaracterized His Father, for he was "slaving" away in the fields and had never, in his mind, received anything. We see the Father's true heart towards his son in verse 31, and it isn't to have him be a slave, but rather he is his son, whom he loves and desires to share everything.
Secondly, the son was very judgmental towards his brother. He apparently knew what his brother had been up to, and now couldn't believe his father would be restoring him and celebrating his return. In the older brother's mind, the younger son had done much wrong, and probably needed to be punished, not celebrated.
Third, the older son was letting his attitude(s) cause him to miss part of what the Father wanted him to experience! Rather than go into the party, he stayed outside and fumed. He wasn't going to go in, and even when the Father came out to him and pleaded with him, he refused, choosing to hold onto his anger, his misperception and his judgment. What a sad statement that was by the older son. His heart was so bitter and angry, that he was refusing the goodness of the Father.
So, the insight I had yesterday was that I can be like the older son in many ways, especially when things don't turn out the way I think they should, or planned for them to turn out. As I was reflecting on the older sons sour disposition, I was reminded by the Lord of my attitude towards a situation that occurred this year with my employment. In short, last December my company had signed a large contract with my customer, and if everything stayed on course 2017 was going to be one of my best years ever financially. Instead, in January my company shut its doors, and I was laid off for 3 months. Then when I got hired, I was hired by a new company that wouldn't pay me my previous rate, but instead gave me a 15% reduction in pay and has a compensation plan that won't pay me any commissions for all of 2017. So instead of a year of financial blessing, I find myself in a situation where I hope to make 50% of what I made last year.
Recently the Lord has been addressing my bad attitude towards my present position, and has specifically pointed towards my wrong perceptions of His plan. To me, this year seems like a bit of a slap in the face. At times, I have been angry and frustrated, and feeling cheated, like I slaved away for the last two years, and now I have to start all over again, and on top of that get to make 50% less. My fleshly response was one of feeling sorry for myself, and wanting to bail out and find something better for myself. Yesterday, it seemed like the Lord pointed out to me that this was awfully similar to the older son's attitude! I realized that was exactly the case, and I need to repent of my wrong heart attitude. I found myself believing that the Father had ripped me off, that I hadn't deserved this kind of treatment, that I was being treated unfairly. I found myself believing that I had somehow been duped by the Father into a situation that was not to my liking, sort of a "I didn't sign up for this!" attitude. At times, I have found myself thinking that it didn't seem to make much sense to follow the Lord's direction if this was going to be the result. This caused me to speak poorly of my situation, casting about my sour attitude and bitterness for others to see, in some ways wanting to feel vindicated in my frustration. I am sure the older brother was preaching to the servants and those who would listen how unjust the Father was being, etc.
The truth is that the Lord has been extremely gracious to me this year! We have more than enough money! He had us downsize our house last year and because of that we are financially sound in spite of the significant reduction. I have been given significant favor with my customer and it seems everything is on an accelerated track. I have heard the Lord speak to my heart and console me numerous times and felt His love constantly. His blessing isn't always financial, His love isn't always demonstrated with gifts and provision, His mercy is constant, His forgiveness is never ending. In the employment realm, the last few weeks have suddenly become very hopeful, and much of what I have been working to accomplish is looking like it will bear fruit. This is obviously good news, but more important is my heart realignment and adjusting my attitude!
The older son, when He refused to go inside because of his bitterness and anger, missed seeing his Father's blessing and restoration of his younger son! We want to be where the Father is doing restorative work, where He is extending mercy and speaking forgiveness! We want to embrace Him in that place, so that we might see His true character and glory! If we remain bitter and angry, we may very well find ourselves outside looking in when the Father starts to move and release blessing. Our position is totally dependent on our own choices, attitudes, and decisions.
Going forward I am going to endeavor to believe the Father's plan and relationship is much better than I can imagine! I am going to check my attitude at the door every morning, and enter into that which the Father provides and blesses me with, for I know that He loves me and shares everything with me!
Amen!
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